Kissing Scene for Cupid's Literary Connection

Hello everyone! Welcome to the blog! Whether your a follower or jumping over from Cupid's Literary Connection for the Kissing Competition, I hope you enjoy this little excerpt from my YA fantasy GARDEN OF THORNS.

*Please know that I am an honorary mention only, as my entry #102 has been pushed through by one amazing bouncer*

The set-up: Rose has just escaped from being captured and fought her way back to the rebel camp. Rayce, the rebel leader who has always been there for her, awkwardly enters her tent and tells her that he was worried she might be dead and that made him realize just how important she is to him.
________________________

He rests his forehead on mine, placing a hand on either side of my face so that all I can see is the scar that mars his tanned skin and his eyes that appear almost black this close.

“Then I’m yours, Rose,” he says, his rough fingers trailing down my face to the hollow of my neck.

He’s giving himself to me, a possession I can’t place on my shelf next to my scissors or borrowed belt. Something I can’t lose. The most precious thing I’ve ever been offered. He deserves to hear it too for being everything I never even dreamed could be possible.

“And I’m yours,” I whisper, letting my fingers travel over the scratchy surface of his chin to trace the lines of his marking near his left eye.

My words earn me inches. He leans in, closing the space between us, sealing our words with something deeper than promises, stronger than steel. I tilt up my face, my own mouth tingling as I meet him inch by slow inch, breath by breath, heartbeat for heartbeat. Our mouths meet as lost and hesitant as he looked when he first walked in. But they keep working, finding their meaning in the words we spoke. He pulls me closer, his hands gripping the middle of my arms like I might pull away. I press in to his hard body, feel the way he doesn’t even have to move for me to fit him.

We fall deeper into each other, his hands finding their way to the hem of my tunic, sneaking up under it to press warmly against the small of my back. I nearly tip over as his mouth travels down the line of my jaw, planting kisses on skin I never even knew could feel warmth.

For once in my life I don’t measure time passing with the sound of our breathing. They aren’t any heartbeats ticking out seconds or stories to weave into the empty space. Right now there is just me and him. I am so whole I'm spilling over and Rayce’s lips catch every last drop.

________________________



So there is it! I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Love to hear what you think and I look forward to reading some kissy scene from the other entries.

Thanks!

Insecure

From a writer's perspective there are three types of great books in the world.

Ego Booster: "Great book. And, you know, I think I can write just as well as this author. This book gives me hope that eventually I will get published if I keep working hard and don't give up."

Inspirational:  "I love this book! I want to write and write and write until I can write as well as this author and create a masterpiece like this one!"

Dream Dasher: "This book is so amazing. It is so amazing that I will never, ever be able to write so magnificently or come up with an idea so awesome. I might as well just quit."

I admit, I'm reading a dream dasher right now. It is so amazing and so clever. I've been reading it aloud to anyone who will listen. And it makes me want to throw my own middle grade verse novel in the garbage.

I'm sure this was not Katherine Applegate's intent when she wrote Home of the Brave, but unfortunately it can be a side-effect of a terrific novel.

Do amazing books ever make you feel insecure?

Too Afraid to Review?

I saw a conversation on Twitter the other day where authors were encouraging writers never to post a bad review of a book anywhere on the internet.

Why? Because someday that writer might want to work with the editor of said hated book, or he/she may need a blurb from that writer. We want to make friends, not burn bridges.

I felt a little defensive when I read this advice.

Do you think authors need to leave their critical-thinking caps in the closet when they're writing reviews? Should honest book reviewers never try to write novels?

I'm not talking about people who go out of their way to slam books just to be mean. I'm talking about thoughtful, critical reviews. Sometimes a thoughtful, critical review can cast a book in a negative light. We live in a culture where a bunch of three-star ratings can bring a book down.

While I'm all for preserving bridges and making friends and building relationships, I don't think editors are so egotistical that they cannot take a critical review of one of their books with grace. We all are trying to grow and learn. Editors, too!

I don't want to be afraid to give a two or three star rating on Goodreads if I think it's deserved. I would honestly hope any editor I worked with would be more interested in my book than in my opinions about other books. But maybe I'm too idealistic.

How about you? If you're a writer, do you shy away from giving honest reviews of certain books because of possible backlash? Do you avoid reviewing books at all? (If you're not a writer -- lucky you! You can review however you want!)

I'm really interested to hear what you all think, so please let me know in the comments!

My Cheerleading Post

In college, pretending to be a cheerleader.

Any Nano participants out there?

If so, you're almost there! Keep going! Rah, rah, rah! I'm so personally and professionally proud of you!

I did Nano in November last year and LOVED it. Don't hate me for this if you've struggled (just keep reading), but I filled out my numbers every day and watched my little graph take off. It was so much fun, and by the end I had a very, very, very bad novel to show for it.

After almost a year of editing, I'm finally querying it. Success story, right?

I was ready to query back in October, and also ready to dive into a new project, so I decided to do Nano in October instead, with the wonderful Emily King as my fellow write-a-novel-in-a-month partner and cheerleader.

You guys, it was brutal. (Not because of Emily. Because of ME.)

And Emily kicked my bee-hind.

She was like at 800,000 words and I was still limping along at 200.

Okay, that's a tiny exaggeration.

It was SO HARD, though!

And for the first time in my life, I HATED WRITING.

*gasp*

I didn't want to sit down at my computer. I found other things to do. Usually I procrastinate doing lots of things in the name of writing, but now the tables were turned and I was spending time ... cleaning my bathtub!

I know, I know. Horrifying.

But, you know, I think Emily can attest to this, I kept plowing through. It was painful and hard, but I actually made it to something like 45,000 words and then I was so cross-eyed with the draft I decided to go back and start revising. I didn't want to finish the book right then because I knew certain parts of it were very wrong and I needed to get those right before I figured out the ending. (Pantser alert!)

Then November arrived and I began revising.

And, people, I was like a bird released from its cage. I started reading through my stuff and ... surprisingly ... I liked it, especially the beginning! And I fell in love with these characters again, and I made them even quirkier, and now I'm at 55,000 words and actually moving toward the climax and the ending.

I feel good. Finally!

All this to say, if you're Nano-ing it, and even if you're not Nano-ing it, but are in a tough spot with drafting or revising or whatever it is that feels like pulling teeth....

KEEP GOING.

It gets better. And someday you will have fun with it again.

Right? Of course, right! Please share in the comments about when you've had to push through a tough time. I know it's not always easy. And we've all been there. Let's share our joys and sorrows.

((GROUP HUG))

(And THANK YOU, Emily, for keeping me going!)

What Makes an Editor?

Disclaimer: I'm not referring to anyone in particular in this post. These are thoughts that have been bouncing around in my head that need an outlet. I sincerely want to learn from your opinions and anecdotes, so bring them to the comments!

What's the difference between an editor and a critique partner? I mean, really?

Critique partners give critiques.

And we, as writers, have the option to hire editors to give us feedback on our work.

And many of us are holding out for this dream of traditional publishing because an experienced editor will be working with us to make our books sparkle.

So, what is an editor?

Can our critique partners stick a sign on their blogs proclaiming themselves "editors" and start charging for critiques? Is that what an editor is? A paid critique partner? 

Or are editors those who are invested in the project because they know the success of the book will reflect on them and their publishing houses? Are these editors driven to do a more thorough job because the success of the book matters to them financially?

When a writer signs a traditional contract in a book deal, he or she is agreeing to go along with the editor's suggestions. (Of course, a writer can always say no to editing suggestions, but from what I've heard, he or she had better have a darn good reason.)

When you're reading a critique partner's suggestions, that's all they are--suggestions, meant to make you think about your book, meant to give another perspective. You can ignore everything they say if you want and it doesn't matter at all. I love all my critique partners dearly, but as much as I value their opinion, I don't  consider them "editors."

I took my agent's feedback on my book very seriously, so does that mean a book that has been critiqued by an agent has been "edited?"

Then we have to consider all the different types of editors out there ... Maybe our book has been edited by a freelancer, but did that freelancer copy edit? Did someone line edit? Is that even important any more in this publishing climate?

What's your experience? If you've self-pubbed, did you hire a freelance editor and did you take all their suggestions very seriously? How did you choose that editor? Or did you trust your critique partners enough to go for it without an editor?

And if you're traditionally published, how was your experience with your editor? Did you feel like that person helped you? I've heard editors have less and less time to devote to each individual project. Is this true, in your experience?

And if you're as yet unpublished, what are your plans? Are you holding out for a Big-House editor with years of experience under her belt, or do you think slogging your way through the process is overrated?

There are no wrong answers here, folks. Times are changing, and with so many options out there, I'm curious how others are making their publishing decisions.

On to the comments!

Photo credit: cohdra from morguefile.com

Comfort Tense

I'm editing the first, messy draft of my new YA contemporary set in Hong Kong.

So far it's fun, but I have a confession to make.

I can't write in first person past tense.

I've tried with several books, but then I get a few chapters in and have to switch back because I'm too confused to go on.

This is my question:

Do people who write in first person past tense choose a time period from which their main character is viewing the events of the story?

I'm asking because when I get to the necessary telling bits of the story, I always screw up.

In present tense it's easy. For example:

Gerald has a track record of stealing my best friends. Anyone who hangs around me realizes she has an excellent shot at getting a boyfriend thrown into the bargain. I eye Gerald, trying to see him like a non-sister-person might. He’s painfully awkward and a video-games nerd, but I can see girls thinking that’s loveable. And he’s cute, of course, which doesn’t hurt his prospects. 

When I try to put this type of paragraph into past tense, I get confused. If my MC is telling the story from some point in the future, all this stuff might still be true about Gerald, so shouldn't it still be in present? Plus, I feel like it sounds odd in past tense, as if Gerald is now dead (at the time of the story's telling).... For example:

Gerald had a track record of stealing my best friends. Anyone who hung around me realized she had an excellent shot at getting a boyfriend thrown into the bargain. I eyed Gerald, trying to see him like a non-sister-person might. He was painfully awkward and a video-games nerd, but I could see girls thinking that was loveable. And he was cute, of course, which didn't hurt his prospects.

See what I mean? Or am I crazy? Is that how it's supposed to be or is some sort of hybrid paragraph the right way to go? For example:

Gerald has a track record of stealing my best friends. Anyone who hangs around me realizes she has an excellent shot at getting a boyfriend thrown into the bargain. I eyed Gerald, trying to see him like a non-sister-person might. He was painfully awkward and a video-games nerd, but I could see girls thinking that was loveable. And he was cute, of course, which didn't hurt his prospects.

Any advice from past tense ninjas out there? (MELISSA!) Have I successfully confused anyone else?

I'm reading this book right  now, which happens to be in first person past tense and I'm trying to study it to see how a master like Maureen Johnson pulls it off. Maybe some day I'll get brave enough to switch out of my comfort tense.

Do you have a favorite tense?

Promoted

Don't freak out. I'm still a mom writing away during those kid-nap-time hours. That hasn't changed.

And I really didn't get an actual promotion, but it feels that way.

I've been promoted from Soccer Mom
(who runs kids around town from one activity to the next)
to

Gymnastics Mom

(who runs kids around town from one activity to the next AND drives forty minutes three times a week to a larger city where her six-year-old daughter is on a competitive gymnastics team)

This means I have:

1. Less time
2. Organizational/logistical skills required that were previously optional
3. Stress increase
4. Excitement increase (I'm super excited for this opportunity for my daughter)
5. Kid-management/mad-snack-distribution skills required that were previously optional

The truth is, after dinner every night, I'm ready to crash. At least two nights this week I've gone to bed with the kids. Staying up late to write just isn't happening.

I'm still getting writing done, but it means I have to be productive during my kids' nap times.

A friend asked me just last night, "How do you have time to write?"

When I said, "Nap time," he gave the response most people do: a small chuckle.

But it's true. I'm fiercely protective of that two-hour (sometimes three if I'm lucky) nap time. I know there are a million other things I could be doing  (laundry! mopping! general tidying! taking a nap myself!) but I IGNORE THEM so I can write. That's the only way I'm going to get anything done.

I'm hoping once my body and mind adjust to this "promotion," the stress will decrease and the nightly productivity will increase ... but until then, nap time is IT.

The goal is that we'll all be able to pursue our dreams, big and little kids alike.

Do you have an insane schedule? How do you manage it and make time to do what you love?

Photo credit: karpati from morguefile.com

What's Your Reading Style?

I was thinking about this the other day as I stared at my little Goodreads page. I think I'd entered a contest for a book and everybody else who entered had thousands of books on their lists and I had some pathetic number--42, I think.

Don't let this number fool you. I love to read.

But when I started thinking about it, although I love reading and I make reading a regular habit, I don't get through a huge number of books in a year. My writing definitely takes precedence over reading. Also, I'm not a fast reader. Editing has trained me to be slow and careful.

When I sink into a book, it's like sinking into a hot bath. I'm not a woman on a mission. I'm there to enjoy it, savor the moment.

I'm curious ... what's your reading style? Do you devour book after book or are you more of a tortoise? If you're a writer, do you spend more time reading than writing, or are you primarily a writer? 

It's my birthday next week, and since I'm sneaking up close to 300 hundred followers, I'm planning a little critique giveaway. I have one critique in the lineup that I promised a friend, but after that, my schedule is wide open, so I thought it would be a fun way to celebrate a birthday and a milestone at the same time. I hope you'll check back next week to enter!

Also, on a side note, Sharon Mayhew has a little critique fest going on right now at her blog. I'm entry # 2 if you'd like to head over there and leave a comment. These are lots of fun and I always walk away learning something from the experience. (My writing friend Grace, who guest blogged for me once before, also decided to enter. This is her first time putting something up for public critique, so if you have time, check out entry #8. Thanks!) 

Photo credit: grafixar from morguefile.com

I Love Being a Novel-Writing Mom

It might seem illogical, but being a busy mom really can work  well with a writing schedule.

Why? Here are five reasons I love being a novel-writing-mom on this fabulous Monday afternoon:

(1) When I get a quiet moment or two, I'm focused (usually). Writing's on the agenda. I don't have the luxury to say, "I'll write later today." When the kids are napping, the time is now.

(2) Lots of opportunity for percolation time. Lots of brainless activity goes into keeping a household of seven running: laundry to fold, dishes to wash, vacuuming, and even cleaning that green bathtub every couple years. This is the best time to think through my novels and plan my writing goals for the day.

(3) Writing gives me a creative outlet. I don't have to stare at a screen all day doing "other stuff" or using up my creative energy in my day job. (I know a lot of wonderful moms who use a lot of their creative energy on their kids, but I'm not really that way. I adore my kids, feed them, clothe them, clean them ... and let them play on their own. *grin*)

(4) Though I'm busy, my time is flexible. I'm not required to go on business trips or be in an office for eight hours a day. If I really need to get something done, my kids entertain themselves for awhile.

(5) Living on one salary with five kids and a mortgage makes you poor. *smile* We don't have a lot of extra money to spend on trips or outside entertainment, which means we are at home a lot, which in turn means more time to write. Writing is my #1 form of entertainment.

So, how about you? Anything to add to the list? How does your day job help or hinder your writing goals?

My sweet bunch!

Lucky 7

My lovely sister-in-law ("the other Amy Sonnichsen") is getting married this weekend, so we're heading out of town for the wedding. Things are busier than normal for sure. Not only do we  have packing and primping to accomplish (and the very-important question of which pair of shoes will go best with my dress!), but today we're having all our heating ducts cleaned after the great toilet overflow.

Meanwhile, this Lucky 7 bit-of-fun has been circulating the blogiverse, so when Sarah Pearson invited anyone who hadn't been tagged yet to join in, I jumped at it the opportunity for a short, fun post. I've loved reading other excerpts from people's novels, so I'm taking a deep breath and diving in.

 Here are the Lucky 7 guidelines:

1. Go to page 77 of your current MS/WiP
2. Go to line 7
3. Copy down the next 7 lines, sentences or paragraphs, and post them as they're written
4. Tag 7 authors

Here's my 77th page, 7th line, 7 paragraphs, from my currently-shelved-awaiting-revision novel RED BUTTERFLY:  (and, of course, Blogger has done something ridiculous with my formatting!)
“Would you do that with Madison—give her to your next door neighbors and send money every month? Would you even think of doing that?”
“Of course not!” 
“Then why are you telling me to do it?”
“Because she’s not your daughter!” Jody cries. “And you need to get a life!”

I wrap the pillow around my face, up to my ears, but there’s no need. The conversation ends abruptly. The bedroom door opens and Mom stalks in. I can hear her raspy breathing through the semi-darkness as she clicks the door shut behind her. The lights from the opposite building cast strange shadows across the bed, lighting Mom’s face in an artificial glow. She blinks in the dimness, her face haggard, jaw slack. She looks as if she’s lived a thousand years since this morning. 

“You heard all that,” she says when she sees me awake.

I bury my face again. The bed creaks as Mom crawls over it. She wraps her arms around me and hoists me over so I’m bundled on her lap. “I wanted to be the one to tell you,” she says. “About Daddy. I’m angry with Jody for going behind my back—” She chokes on tears and I bury my face in her bosom, against the cotton of her blouse. “This is a hard problem, Kara, but we’ll figure something out. I don’t want you to be afraid.”

Have you played Lucky 7 yet? If not, consider yourself tagged!

More on Diversity & Hacky Sacking

Thanks for the great discussion last Thursday about ethnic diversity in Young Adult novels. A couple more thoughts:

• It's interesting that several of us felt insecure writing other ethnicities into our books because we were afraid of "getting it wrong." That's a valid fear when we consider that other ethnicities have different cultures than our family culture. But what if we're writing about, say, Americans or Canadians, or any resident of a country with a diverse population? Does that change anything? I'm Polish American. Would an Irish American feel nervous writing about a character like me? I guess it depends on how I was raised. If I were from a Polish neighborhood in Chicago and if my Polish-speaking grandmother lived with us, then yes, that Irish American writer better know something about Polish culture. But if I grew up in Suburbia, Anywhere, USA, the fact that I'm part Polish wouldn't play as big a part.
• With this said, it seems like our fear of "getting it wrong" stems from a fear of being labeled racist. If our ethnicity is different from our protagonist, we might worry that we'll be judged for any flaws we give that character. 
• And then there's the fear of stereotyping. Say we have a Chinese-American protagonist who plays tennis and gets straight A's in school and her biggest fault is that she studies too much and cares too much about her grades. Uh. No. That's a HUGE Asian-American stereotype. We fall into stereotypes when we're afraid of really getting to know our characters. Maybe we're afraid to make our Chinese-American protagonist a drug dealer because we might offend Chinese-Americans in general. Or we worry people will think we're trying to say all Chinese-American girls are drug dealers.
• These are valid concerns and it's important to be aware of these issues as we write, but I don't think they should stop us from writing with diversity.
• My challenge to myself, and maybe to all writers, is to allow myself to be color blind in that first draft. Craft your interesting, fascinating, flawed protagonist and then, later, decide on the color of her skin. Would that change your book at all? Isn't it fair to assume that a fourth generation Korean-American is just as American as a fourth generation Italian-American? If there are details to tweak, there's time to tweak, but if we're worried about stereotypes, perhaps this could be a way to combat them.

Thoughts? Am I way off with any of this? Anything you'd like to add?

Speaking of ethnically diverse novels, I'll be hosting Samuel Park on my blog next week. He'll be sharing some writing wisdom with us to celebrate the paperback release of his debut THIS BURNS MY HEART. There will also be a little giveaway involved that you writers will love, so please stop by.

And last, but certainly not least, the Hacky Sack Club is going strong with two more members! I am working on my Wall of Shame Fame, but co-founder Janet already has hers up (because she's awesome that way). I'd publicly like to welcome our new victims members:

• Leigh T. Moore who charmed us all with her fabulous juggling video (though she did not juggle the cat)
• Melissa Sarno who wowed us with her hacky-sacking-while-speaking-Hindi video

The goal of the Hacky Sack Club is to bring a little silly community to the normally solitary lives of writers. If you'd like to join, you can read all about it >>here<<. Any weird talent accepted!

Why Fiction?

"We demand windows. Literature as Logos is a series of windows, even of doors. One of the things we feel after reading a great work is 'I have got out.' Or from another point of view, 'I have got in'; pierced the shell of some other monad and discovered what it is like inside ...  In reading great literature I become a thousand men and yet remain myself. Like the night sky in a Greek poem, I see with a thousand eyes, but it is still I who see. Here, as in worship, in love, in moral action, and in knowing, I transcend myself; and am never more myself than when I do." 

~C.S. Lewis

Do you ever wonder why fiction exists-- why you write or read it? I love Lewis's take. Any additional thoughts?

WiP Monday: Because I Don't Post on Wednesday Anymore

Oops, was it Monday today? *checks calendar* Yep. *Scurries to write blog post*

Today I'm talking Works in Progress (WiPs) because I haven't blogged about them in awhile.  Probably because I'm now on a Blog Schedule that does not include "WiP Wednesdays." So, WiP Monday it is!

I have three WiPs in three different stages of development. I've given them all nicknames which may or may not be part of their titles.

1. SEAGULL: This one's almost ready for a secondary round of submissions after a bunch of revisions. She's going to get a title overhaul, too, but I'm not sure what that will be yet. I'm still waiting to declare her perfect-as-possible and then we'll see about finalizing that pesky new title.
2. BUTTERFLY: This is my sweet little book, which unfortunately also happens to be enigmatic. In other words, she doesn't fit where she's supposed to fit. She may not be YA, but she's not MG ... and are coming-of-age stories salable, anyway? All this remains to be seen. For now, she is shelved and waiting to be reborn, like the butterfly that she is.
3. CRAZY: The nickname says it all. This book is crazy, and the main character is a bad girl. I'm having a lot of fun writing her because I'm not a bad girl, but she is also difficult to write for the same reason. I wrote the first draft of this baby during Nano last year, and am writing a second draft now. Let me tell you, it's a complete overhaul. Characters needed to change. A bunch of it needs tossing (and flogging). The whole story needs to be re-imagined. Yeah. But it's fun -- one of my favorite parts of this thing called writing novels. And just to tell you how complete this overhaul is, I'm not even referring to draft one. That was so last November.

 So, how about you? How are your projects going? Anything fun to share?

Real Time Writer-Mom

Kim Smith has a wealth of ideas for me for my blog (and I am grateful because sometimes my brain feels a little depleted over here). Her exact words to me this morning were:  Give us details, stay-at-home-writing-mama!  So, here are all the gritty details, because I'm anxious to stomp out this rumor that I'm Superwoman (Kristin, I'm looking at you, Birthday Girl). 

I'll be updating this post throughout today as life (and writing) unravels.

6:30a.m. - Wake up late because Baby was up half the night yodeling. I couldn't leave her in the crib because she shares a room with two siblings and would wake them up. So we had deep conversations at 3a.m. She also worked on her kick boxing skills. I finally stripped off her pajamas and let her lie there in her onesie. She finally fell asleep around 5. Was she hot in her pajamas? I DON'T KNOW.

7a.m. - Sluggishly make breakfast and help children get ready for school.

8a.m. - Leave to drop off kids; pick up niece; drop off 2 children; pick up Daycare Boy; drop off 1 more child and niece; head home with 3yo + Crabby Baby who spent the night yodeling + Daycare Boy.

8:30a.m. - 3yo & Daycare Boy want to paint. I make phone calls to rearrange appointments that won't work with schedule. Crabby Baby wanders around the house crying.

9a.m. - Sit down to start blog post. Crabby baby demands to be fed. Stop blog post. Feed baby. Back to blog post.

9:30a.m. - Take 10yo Locks of Love donation to post office to mail.

9:50a.m. - Attempt to right wooden playground equipment in backyard that was blown over in yesterday's wind storm. Too heavy. Must wait for Dashingly Handsome Sidekick (DHS).

10a.m. - Snack time for 3yo & Daycare Boy. Attempt to clean kitchen. Put away paints.

10:15a.m. - Throw in load of laundry. Snack time for Crabby Baby.

10:45a.m. - Put Daycare Boy on bus to preschool. Sing to Crabby Baby. Crabby Baby falls asleep.

11:00a.m. - Read to 3yo:

• The Little Engine that Could by Watty Piper
• Amazing Grace by Mary Hoffman
• Please Louise by Frieda Wishinsky & Marie-Louise Gay
• Mouse Tales by Arnold Lobel

11:30a.m. - Tell "I'm not tired" 3yo we must both shut our eyes for a few minutes.

12 noon - Wake up. Rush out to start writing. Oh wait, did not do Bible study this morning because I slept in, so must do that first. Lunch? Maybe later.

12:15 - Sit down to study the book of James: MERCY TRIUMPHS by Beth Moore.

12:35 - Write, write, write like a mad woman. THE BABIES ARE ASLEEP! Today I have two goals: Finish the edit on my Seagull book & work on the synopsis for my Butterfly book.

1:20 - 3yo wakes up. Make lunch for her and set her up on the computer to play games.

1:30 - Warm up lunch for myself -- leftover Chinese pot roast, rice and veggies. Delish. Read, read, read, edit, edit, edit while I'm eating.

2:00 - Baby wakes up. Feed Happy Baby lunch.

2:20 - Leave to pick up kids. Stop by the public library to pick up Gary D. Schmidt's OKAY FOR NOW, which I have on hold.

3:30 - Get home, read the first page and jacket copy of OKAY FOR NOW and decide I'll never be as good a writer as Gary D. Schmidt. Pace the kitchen with a worried feeling in my gut.

3:33 - Tell that worried feeling to SHUT UP.

3:35 - Squeeze out more reading/editing time while the kids do their homework.

5:00 - Drop off 5yo at ballet. Pick up the DHS from school. Ask DHS on the way home in most pitiful voice if we can have something else for dinner besides the chilli I have planned because chilli does not sound even mildly appetizing.** The DHS is kind and agrees we can use our gift certificate to the local Mexican restaurant tonight. Yahoo!

6:00 - 5yo returns from ballet and announces that she got the solo part for her age group in the upcoming production of Sleeping Beauty. She'll be Baby Aurora. So proud of her! 

6:30 - Off to Mexican restaurant where we eat too many chips and barely have room for anything once the meal arrives.

7:45 - Return from Mexican restaurant. Get children in pajamas. Read to them. Make sure they all brush their teeth. House smells because 8yo ate too many beans.

9:15 - All is quiet. Back at the laptop with plans to finish the last skim-through of my edits. (Isn't it amazing how many little mistakes there still can be after an edit? All these little loose threads to snip off. Here or there where I mentioned something and after the edit it doesn't make sense any more. That's what this skim-through is for. Today I've corrected at least twenty tiny mistakes.)

1a.m. - I don't usually stay up this late, but I accomplished all my writing goals. Edit finished. Synopsis typed. Goodnight all! Sweet dreams!


**The DHS is leaving for a conference tomorrow and will be gone all weekend. This is why the pitiful voice worked so well. I know he already feels bad about leaving me with the five kids by myself for three days, especially the potential yodeler, who, Mimi is right, might be teething. Yay for Mexican food and no cooking or dishes!

Go for Big

Photo courtesy of Morguefile

"If your dreams don't scare you, they're not big enough." 

~Unknown

This quote tells me:

It's okay to be terrified of success

There's nothing wrong with going for BIG

In fact, maybe going for BIG is what we're all meant to do

We all have different ways of going for BIG. A lot of you reading this blog are writers and there are certain scary aspects of writing success (at least for me!)--

1) Launch parties

2) School visits

3) Busyness

4) Balancing acts

5) Expectations

6) Reviews

Just to name a few....

But that's how it is with every BIG endeavor. We wonder if once we "make it" we'll be able to rise to the challenge. 

It takes faith. And guts. 

Just like anything worthwhile.

Think of people who run marathons, foster children, start foundations, get married, go on crusades for good causes, go back to school, fight legal battles in the name of justice, pursue ridiculous dreams, make other people's dreams come true, start new jobs, move to foreign countries....

We all have our own ways of living BIG, and we were meant to live BIG, to hatch dreams more brilliant than we could ever imagine.

What's your dream?

And does it terrify you? 

**

Congratulations to DAWN SIMON who is the winner* of Gae Polisner's THE PULL OF GRAVITY.

Yay, Dawn! I'll track you down to get your mailing address. 

Thanks to everyone who entered and thanks again to Gae for being my honored guest. 

*Random.org

**

Hacky Sack Club -- We Want YOU!

So my perfectly adorable bloggy friend Janet Johnson and I got a little silly recently.

It all started with >>this post<< in which I waxed nostalgic about China and how it was so nice to be in a culture where most people had few inhibitions. I mentioned hacky sack playing in the park, and the legend goes that bloggy friend Janet made a comment about wishing American were more uninhibited, which turned into an email conversation about wishing we could play hacky sack together, which turned into Janet sending me a hacky sack in the MAIL, which turned into me sending back a hacky sack (a REAL Chinese hacky sack, purchased from a sweet little old lady sitting on the side of the road who handmade these hacky sacks and probably earned a living from them), which turned into "Wouldn't it be awesome to do a blog post about this?" 

So, here we are.

The thing is, being a writer is such a solitary occupation. You and your computer. (Or you and your notebook if you're old fashioned.) But blogging gives us a chance to rub shoulders with lots of other writers. We support each other. We read each other's books. We pat each other on the back. We spread the word and promote one another's careers. And we commiserate. 

Now comes icing on the cake. 

WE CAN PLAY HACKY SACK TOGETHER.**

 

Only virtually, of course.

But still. How fun is this to have a virtual hacky sack club?

All you have to do to join the HACKY SACK CLUB is 

1. Steal a button from the sidebar
2. Post a picture or a video of yourself playing hacky sack on your blog

And guess what? I'll send you a real hacky sack in the mail. (Just include your email address so I can get in touch with you.)

Make sure to check out Janet's post, too. Her video ROCKS. Her tight exercise pants inspired my spandex.

**I love you all or I wouldn't have embarrassed myself like this.

Guest Post by Jen: The Journey

I used to think I’d have one of those J.K. Rowling experiences. You know, the girl who lived (since the boy had already lived) … add a little romance, call it YA, and ship it off to agent land where they’d weep at my wordage and offer me book and movie contracts simultaneously. Not to mention the words would continue to flow after I sold the books, showing the world Writer’s Block was merely a myth. 

Well, that was two years ago and I’ve had more than 13 rejections (take that J.K. Rowling), so the path I envisioned hasn’t exactly fallen into place. I guess you could say it was slightly different (and by that, I mean DRASTICALLY different). 

I wrote a book. I thought it rocked. It didn’t. I was told my character would be hated … turns out, they were right. I wrote three more books, improved slightly. Read Stephen King’s On Writing, became inspired. Wrote two additional books.

Queried one, received feedback that said it was way too unique for marketing. That was the first time they didn’t mention the suckage. I considered that a success. I found a publisher interested in my work despite its uniqueness. Thought I was on my way up, until the relationship didn’t end up the way I’d dreamed about.

I moved on … broken, defeated, and feeling worthless. It was then a light shined down and I found Still Moments Publishing. They were asking for anthologies and gave you certain requirements to follow. A spark lit in my heart and the words flew onto the blank page. I had the passion I’d missed for months, the chance to be something, and to share something special with others.

Guess what? Still Moments Publishing felt the same way about me. They took a chance on me. The publisher is a gem and the editors are kind (even when telling you something isn’t working). The team is full of rock stars and I’m overjoyed to be included. 

It is with confetti, sparkles, and theme music that my first published works is released, "Snowbanked." A part of the Snowbound Hearts Anthology! 

I’ve learned that success is measured by accomplishments, not by your ultimate goal. This ebook that’s releasing is just another fabulous milestone I, as a writer, get to enjoy along with others. I’m a success because I choose to be. I’d love for you to grab a copy of Snowbound Hearts and send me your thoughts! 

What’s your latest success?

**

I have "Snowbanked" at the top of my TBR pile. A big thank you to Jen Daiker for sharing the details of her journey. Jen, I wish you every success!

Baby Steps

This is what I've been up to lately: 

Today my sweet Naomi Rose is one year old!

Where did the time go? (That is not a rhetorical question. You can answer in the comments. *wink*)

In other happy news, I finished another draft of my China book and am making eyes at my critique partners to see who has time to read it. I'm a little nervous because I have sweat blood over this project and am hoping it doesn't turn out to be a piece of trash.  

Need to remind myself that just like any journey, it's all about baby steps.

On Thursday I have a very special guest post planned, so please come back and read. The amazing Jen Daiker will be visiting from her blog Unedited.  I always love reading about other writers' journeys and I know you'll enjoy Jen's perspective. She has a lot of good news on her blog lately, so if you don't already follow Jen, pop over there and say hi!

On Rejections and Toilet Cleaning

On this fabulous Thursday night, I thought I'd talk about rejections.

They don't feel good, but if you're a writer who has queried extensively, you know they're part of the biz. We writers develop thick skin. Our critique partners give us feedback, bloody their nails on our books, and we take it with a smile and a thank you.

Then we get rejections from agents, rejections from editors, rejections on paper, rejections by email.

Even at conferences our books are often flayed alive.

And we survive ... killing our darlings, making our characters' lives miserable, putting in long hours in front of a lighted screen.

It's a bloody game.

You'd better believe my skin is thick. I feel like I can take any critique from anybody at any time. I will not shed a tear. Go ahead and reject me. You may make me sad for a day, but you will not make me sad for a week. I'm a survivor. I'm not gonna give up....

HA!

Well, now I have to tell you an embarrassing story.

I entered a local talent show a while back. I was singing with a friend of mine. Another friend was accompanying us on guitar.

I knew my singing friend was coming straight from work to the audition, so I didn't dress up.  (He showed up in a Superman t-shirt, so it's a good thing I didn't wear my evening gown.) I put on my favorite shirt, yes, and my jean capris and thought I looked pretty artsy-fartsy, like many a hip song artist I've seen on MTV.

Because my friend had to go back to work, we were the first to perform. We gave it our best. My friend has an amazing voice, I won't lie, and I was doing harmony. We finished a capella and I thought we did a pretty good job. Our guitarist gave us a thumbs up.

There were three judges sitting below us, scribbling extensive notes.

This is what the first one said to me:  "Excuse me, what are you wearing? It looks like you're about to go clean your toilet."

Guys, seriously, it has taken me this long to post about this experience because it has taken me this long to recover. And honestly, I don't know if I have recovered. That rejection made me feel horrible.* Even now I shudder.

And I wonder, what went wrong with my thick skin?

But you know, several days after this catastrophe, I actually stopped being offended long enough to analyze what this judge was saying ... and yes, make changes.

Over confidence is what killed me in this case. I obviously didn't take the competition (or my outfit) seriously enough.


Which goes to show (maybe) that even the weirdest criticism can actually be a gift. It goes for our writing, too. That person who irritates you when you put your query on the public forum -- maybe that person is the one you need to listen to. That critique partner who gets under your skin and can't seem to remember the sandwich rule -- that's a critique to treasure.

Always take a few days to think through the feedback you get, even when it hurts, because sometimes truth comes flying at us like rotten tomatoes. If you duck, you miss out.**

*NO WAY am I EVER going on American Idol after this. If I can't handle frizzy-haired, velour-jogging-suit judge #1 from Podunk USA, how would I ever face Simon?

**Don't know where that analogy came from, but let's just go with it.

Drawing Inspiration

Jemi Fraser wrote a terrific post >>here<< at  From the Write Angle about getting to know your characters. One of her suggestions was attempting to draw them.

For some reason that sounded fun to me. I was struggling with my WiP and feeling desperate for inspiration.

I pulled out one of my kids' sketch books, broke out a pencil that I think survived my days in art class in British school in Hong Kong (don't ask me why I still have such a thing lying around when I haven't used it in 15 years) ... and attempted a character portrait.

Disclaimer: I am not an artist. My purpose here is to encourage us all to put ourselves out and try new things, even if we're not very good at them!!

Here are the first attempts:

Which were not right. At all. None of these girls looked like my protagonist. A couple were close, but ... nah.

I almost gave up.

But then decided to try one last time:

And there she is! I know she's not perfect. Still, I felt like I was looking at her.

It gave me a rush to put a face with the name. Her name is Kara, by the way.

And, you know what? The week I drew these pictures, I pushed through and finished the second draft of this particular WiP. My little drawing break did the trick!

Have you ever tried drawing one of your characters? What other creative approaches do you use when you're getting to know them?